Happiness at Work: Finding Peace and Fulfillment

Have you experienced days when going to work feels nothing less than going to war? Dealing with the day-to-day drama can make life overwhelming. You feel like you are constantly fighting people and situations. You might even land at the breaking point where you fall into the “I don’t care” anymore zone. Just getting through the day seems like an epic struggle.

In such a state of mind, you may achieve success in your projects, but it will leave you exhausted and unfulfilled. It sucks the joy out of the job that you once loved doing. The good news is that there are small changes you can make to improve the quality of your life at work. However, why are you experiencing negative emotions in the first place?

Suffering comes when you rely on your external environment for happiness. No environment will be perfect or conducive to your happiness all the time. When you’re able to stop looking for happiness outside of yourself, and focus on building it within, you are taking a big step towards positive change. As a result, you remain unscathed and protect your happiness. The way to do this is glad acceptance.

Glad Acceptance

Typically, our resistance is towards external factors which are out of our control. Instead of fighting with people and situations, accept them graciously. Acceptance is a step towards inner peace.

When a Situation Triggers You

Let’s say you lost a deal or a contract you did landed you into a legal dispute. Accept that it has happened, and you will see your mind starts working on creative solutions to move forward. Fight it to defend your ego, and it will breed frustration and eventually despair. It is common to see people attach emotions to outcomes instead of effort. This creates stress and anxiety. After putting your 100% into the effort, accept the outcome graciously, whatever it may be.

This mindset comes with practicing living in the present and self love. If you believe that you put in your best effort, the effort itself becomes the reward. The outcome then feels like an incident and not a reflection of you. If you attach your emotions to outcomes which typically are not in your control, you swing between delight and despair – both of which compromise your inner peace and could even lead to anxiety.

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People Problems

If you experience unfair behavior from your co-workers; once you accept it and let go, it will turn into forgiveness. Instead, fight it and it will breed hatred. Forgiveness comes from humility and empathy. Swallowing your ego isn’t easy, but it’s worth doing this so to reconcile the negativity into positive emotions. If you are unable to detach yourself from people and situations to see things objectively, you can get caught up in a cycle of negativity.

Let’s say an exchange with a colleague is turning unpleasant, and you sense that they’re getting increasingly aggressive. In that moment, pause and take a deep breath before you get carried away by negative emotions. Never return anger with anger.

Instead, listen to the other person and acknowledge their concerns and frustrations. It's often possible that both of you are right in your own ways but there’s a genuine problem on hand that's causing the frustrations. Detaching yourself from the problem will allow you to see it the way the other person does. This will, in turn, empower you to respond in a measured, calm manner. While dealing with people, make a conscious effort to be compassionate. It's more important to be kind than being right.

A Bit of Both

When you see a peer getting a promotion you thought you deserved, accepting and applauding their success will turn it into an inspiration, else you will burn in jealousy. Do not measure yourself against others. Instead choose to look for virtues in every person and aim to develop those too. You can always find something positive in any situation. It may feel fake at first, but the more you applaud others, the easier it becomes. Remind yourself that their success is not your problem, your comparative thinking is.

I have learnt over the years that it’s not worth wasting my will power on fighting every urge I have or on winning every argument. Acceptance is the master key here. Also, it needs to be authentic and from inner work. Do not confuse it with situations where you accept out of lack of another alternative. Such forced acceptance becomes painful.

Acceptance out of compulsion is not contentment; rather, it is helplessness, dependency and powerlessness. True acceptance puts you right into the driver seat once again and in control of your emotions. The fact here is that we cannot dictate the outcome, but we can control our responses and turn them into our favor even if the outcome wasn’t.

Change is a gradual process, so don’t be too harsh on yourself if you slip up along the way. As we learn to turn our negative outcomes into positive emotions, the result breeds happiness.

When work is good, it can be pretty awesome. Success and achievements create fleeting pleasures. You feel you are at the top of your game and can take on anything and anyone. The happier you are, the more likely it is that you will have better results in whatever you are doing. This is because success revolves around happiness and not the other way round.

Think of the days when you are at the top of your game. Business is booming, profits and bonuses are good, your creative juices are oozing new ideas, and you are on a “bring it on'' mode. You are ready to deal with anything and anyone that comes your way. These are also the times when you’ve been at your most productive state. You were most probably in a good mood. In other words, when you’re joyful from the inside, you are likely to succeed more in whatever you do. Happiness gives you a performance edge. You look for creative solutions to problems with a positive mindset.

There are times when things do not go as planned or unpleasant surprises knock on our door. On days like this, when you feel blue, for the first few minutes or hours just pretend to be happy. You can do this by slapping a wide grin on your face or humming a cheerful tune that you like. You will notice that you start feeling happier immediately, as it’s impossible to be gloomy while acting cheerful. As you do this, you get your happiness advantage back and your creative juices start flowing again giving your performance edge back.

A more concrete step in this direction is to foster positive behavior through positive creative thinking. Train your brain to see the good in everything. To share an example here, it was inevitable to accept the work from home norm this year. The first few evenings at home as I saw the sun setting from my balcony I decided that I have always wanted to watch the sunset like this and here’s the opportunity now! Not only just that, over the weeks, I now have a routine at home to sip a cup of coffee watching that scene daily.

An unfortunate situation became an enjoyable moment for me, on a daily basis. With practice, this way you can take your acceptance one level forward by learning to “want what you get” instead of constantly striving to “get what we want”. Developing this attitude takes patience and practice. As it starts becoming a natural phenomenon, the number of things that actually disturb us start reducing. Manufacturing happiness becomes a habit then.

Today corporates have recognized the correlation between employee wellbeing and tangible results at work. Increasingly, organizations are putting real effort into making sure their employees are well looked after. Gone are the days of the miserable 9 to 5: more companies are leaning towards flexible working hours, and many even allow their people to work from home when needed. I’m sure you’ve walked into offices with colorful concept furniture, including hammocks and beanbags. Some offices even let you bring your pet to work, and others have a space dedicated to games and play.

Why do you think this shift has happened? It’s because happy people are naturally more productive. Employees who experience positive emotions often tend to go above and beyond for their businesses. It’s a win-win situation.

A Step in The Right Direction

• Finding a mentor who aligns with your purpose can be a powerful tool. Walking the path towards lasting happiness is simple if you know the path, else it's hardly straightforward. Try to get the guidance of someone who has experienced and mastered this journey. It’s much easier to learn by observing someone who can be a role model, than reading books about it.

• When faced a difficult situation, you typically can do three things. “Change it”, provided you have influence over it. “Accept it” the way it is. It requires effort on your part but is a powerful tool towards inner peace. A part of accepting is also choosing to simply walk away. Not every battle is worth fighting just for the sake of winning.

• Make time to do something that awakens your mind and spirit. Don’t just plan for it, actually schedule it in your calendar to start. For me, that booster is reading. I try to read daily from 5am to 7am. Those two hours are my time, during which I fill my brain and heart with positive, creative thoughts to tide me through the rest of the day. With this powerful start to the day, 50% of the battles that may lie ahead are already won in my mind. Choose an activity and commit to it. Not only will it reinforce your commitment towards yourself, you’ll feel a sense of joy that comes when you work towards your goals and life purpose.

• Most professions involve working closely with people, and when things don’t go as planned, many of us can allow these interactions to stress us out. When dealing with people, choose to focus on each one’s strengths more than their shortcomings. This doesn’t mean that you should ignore the weaknesses of your team. Instead, view weaknesses objectively without being judgemental about the person. That way, you deal with the problem without seeing the person as the problem. Regular introspection has helped how I respond to tense situations at work. It keeps my ego in check as it allows me to observe things neutrally without being judgmental in my responses.

• “It’s crazy busy at work” when did these words become a badge of pride rather than a cause of concern? Life has become so fast that even if there is a spare moment, we rush to fill it in with some task or the other. We are all striving to get the most done in the 24 hours that we have. The key is to invest your mind and time carefully.

Remember, that to complete the journey of an hour, the minute hand has to travel the whole circumference of the clock, while the hour hand just moves an inch. Work smart, find ways in which you can achieve more with a shorter time commitment. Instead of being the minute hand, aim to be like the hour hand of the clock!

Innovation shouldn’t just be a buzzword you read about – embody it in the way you work. Positive creative thinking assures success and happiness both. We may work for various reasons; for happiness, peace, success or even satisfaction, but are we infusing these ideals into how we do our jobs? Take that first step to make happiness a part of how you work.

1 Change “I Don’t Care” to “I Don’t Mind”

There will always be situations you simply cannot control or change. When things get frustrating, consciously accept the situation for what it is to keep your inner peace. To be happy, increase acceptance, reduce expectations

2 Smile More and Be a Reason for Someone’s Smile

Easiest way of creating our own happiness is the act of giving. When we give, we reap the joy of seeing a bright smile, laughter, tears of joy and gratitude for life. If you find yourself feeling gloomy, try making someone else smile and see what happens.

3 Practice “Wanting What You Get”

When you get something different from what you wanted, make a conscious choice to want what you got. This will breed fulfillment and inner peace.